Safe

Last weekend Josh and I were running errands.  While we were out we drove past Jordan Valley Hospital and that reminded me of a funny story I hadn't told Josh about.  What I really want to talk about happened in the car with Josh, but let me give you the story to help you understand the rest.  Here goes.

**********************Story about my Lameness***************************

Several weeks ago my brother and his wife had a new little baby (p.s. he is adorable!...the brother and also the baby).  I wanted to go visit them and meet my new nephew so I had my brother -- also named Josh -- send me the hospital info.  He texted me their room number, the security code and told me the hospital was on Bangater Highway.

I had a little window of time after I dropped Aubrey at dance to scoot out to the hospital and drop in for a meet and greet with this newest little person.  

Aubrey's dance class meets right off of Bangater Highway (no, not on the roadside, they have a studio there) so I schlepped my way South and watched for a hospital.  

At 90th south I found one -- Jordan Valley Hospital -- and turned off.  I made my way in to the labor and delivery area and got in the elevator ready to head up to the third floor because Josh's text said that's where they were stationed.

Unfortunately for me, there was no third floor button in the elevator.  Weird.

So I walked over to the little lady at the counter there.  She was on her cell phone but very kindly (not really) glance up at me long enough to listen to my question.  She pointed down another hall and whispered to me (wouldn't want to mess up her personal phone call) to use the elevator down that hall.

I wandered down that hall.  There was no other elevator that I could see.  I tried another hall and it took me to a more open area and found an elevator there.  Still no third floor.

As I exited this elevator looking confused I ran into a hospital administrator, someone important at this institution.  He offered to help me and I showed him the text from my brother (including the picture of my cute, little nephew...awwww!).  He lead me back to labor and delivery although he used his fancy key card to bypass little-miss-helpful at the admittance desk and we headed up the elevator to the second floor.  Again, he used his fancy key card to get us into the unit where surprised nurses looked at me skeptically.

When I gave them my brother's name they raised their eyebrows and told me there was no one here with that last name.  

What the...

That's when I looked a little closer at the text from my brother and realized he and his wife were at Riverton Hospital -- also on Bangater highway, but just a little further South.

Oh.  My.  Heck.

I chuckled to myself, apologized for my cluelessness and walked as fake confidently as I could out to my car.  Good thing I don't know any of these people or I would have really been embarrassed.  Instead I was just a silly story they can tell their family at dinner.

Anyway, at Riverton Hospital is was a piece of cake to find my brother, sister-in-law, and sweet nephew.  Happy ending.

****************************End of this episode of Lameness************************

So I finish my recitation and Josh is laughing, which is exactly what I expected.  This is not his first encounter with my bouts of directional calamity (see one other such story here).   It will also not be his last encounter with my bouts of directional calamity, I'm sure of that.    

Through his chuckles, Josh reached over, grabbed my hand, kissed it and said, "I just love you."  He shook his head and smiled adoringly.

My amazing man (and our amazing oldest daughter).

And that is why I can tell him things like this.  

With Josh, I am safe.

I don't have to worry that he will berate or belittle me.  I am not concerned that he will make fun of me or put me down because I am extremely clumsy with course commands (although I do always end up where I'm going, just never the easiest way).  He knows me, better than anyone.  And while he will laugh at my foibles (which is fine because I think they're pretty funny, too) he doesn't demean me because of them.  Somehow my mishaps are endearing to him and I love him for it. 

With Josh I don't have to hide who I really am.  I can tell him when I am feeling catty or dorky or frustrated or befuddled or whatever else because he loves me for who I am and I do not doubt that love one bit.  I never wonder about his feelings for me even when I am telling him something absurd or horrible that I have done.  His support gives me confidence even when I really shouldn't have any.

I am ridiculous pretty regularly.  It is just part of my personality (when I was younger I used to fight it, but I don't anymore).  I'm not exactly proud of it, but I own that about myself and I'm not exactly embarrassed by it either (ok, sometimes it's embarrasing, but I try to ignore those moments).

Josh accepts that, and even (it seems) loves me for that eye-rolling part of me.

No wonder I love this guy.